three months

Month Three!

I feel like this month we truly moved from having a 'newborn' to having a baby.  There were so many things that happened!  From Allie's first flight to the first time she rolled over--she's such a joy to be around and we feel so blessed to have such a happy baby.  I absolutely love seeing her smile.  I hope she always smiles the way she does now, with her eyes all squinty and her tongue sticking out.  She may only be 3 months old, but she's such a great companion.  When we go on walks, she has started to put her foot up against the stroller edge and just totally epitomizes "chillin".  Being pregnant opened up a lot of conversation with strangers but having a baby opens it up even more.  I love it.

We think Allie weighs around 15 pounds now.  She won't have another official weigh-in until her 4 month Well Check.  Her eyes are a dark grey and in certain lights they look very brown, so we're thinking they'll change in the next couple of months.  Her hair initially looked reddish as it was coming in but as it's getting longer, it is looking more brown.  She has had some minor cradle cap issues but the other day I rubbed some coconut oil on her little head and it brushed right out!  Good ol' coconut oil.  She has started to drool a LOT in the last week or so and likes to suck on our hands and fabric (she especially loves when she can grab a hold of her bedroom curtains while I'm changing her).  Maybe she's getting ready to start teething?  Not sure but these are certainly new developments in the health department.

Allie is still a great sleeper.  She has been sleeping through the night since she was 9 weeks old.  On September 12, she started eating every 2 hours on the dot and since September 15, she's been sleeping 9 hours or more each night.  We had a few issues when we traveled to New Orleans but overall, we think she handled sleeping in a different place in a different timezone very well.  She did get a little messed up at the end and now (about a week after returning home) she is still not consistently sleeping through the night.  

Here's what her typical schedule looks like:

7:00 eat
7:50 sleep
9:00 eat
9:50 sleep
11:00 eat
11:50 sleep
1:00 eat
1:50 sleep
3:00 eat
3:50 sleep
5:00 eat
5:50 sleep
7:00 bath time, bedtime routine
8:00 eat
8:30 sleep

Allie is still EBF.  Like I mentioned above, she moved from eating every 3 hours to every 2 hours on her own.  I'm trying really hard to stretch her back out to 3 because I think she needs to take longer naps.  When she wakes up, she is typically still rubbing her eyes and yawning.  If we let her soothe herself back to sleep, she will typically make it to the 3 hour mark.  We're still trying to work everything out though.

When people ask me how old Allie is, I love seeing the surprise on their faces when I tell them.  It's typically followed up with "Are you nursing?" and then "Ahh, that's why."  She's a chunky little monkey but I love all her rolls.  She's wearing a mix of 3 month and 3-6 sized clothes.  (I say that but today she wore a 6 month hoodie and leggings.)  I think we'll be moving her up soon because of the length.  She must finally be getting longer because her onesies are really stretching around the neck.  She is still wearing size 2 diapers.

This month, due to all the traveling and excessive drooling, we've been loving the aden + anais swaddle blankets.  I use them as a nursing cover, burp cloths, blanket (for myself), and we swaddle her with her arms out in them every night.  We also use (and LOVE) the Circo Receiving Blankets from Target as burp cloths.  She's been spitting up more the past couple of weeks so we try to have one of these within reach wherever we go.

Allie met Carson's grandfather while we were in New Orleans and she also spent a few days with my mom.  She smiles all the time now and we get what we think is a laugh out of her every now and then.  We're so thankful that we've had the opportunity to spend so much time with both of our families over the past 3 months.  

We really only get cries when Allie is tired.  The hardest part of the flight home from New Orleans was just the fact that she couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep.  Eventually she fell asleep sitting on my lap while I rubbed her belly.  Thankfully, everyone around us was very understanding.

Allie is very interested in toys now and likes to lick things or have things in her mouth.  If she wants something in her mouth, she will very slowly lean towards it with her mouth open and grunt.  She LOVES to be facing forward in the Baby Bjorn because she sucks the crap out of the fabric.  So much so that her drool soaks through to the other side of the carrier.  She's also loving staring at lights and ceiling fans.

On the other hand, she hates being dried off after her bath and we're still struggling with bottle feeding.  

As for me, I feel great!  I have started to lose some hair but it's no more than I lost my last semester of college when I was constantly stressing about finding a job.  I seem to have more acne these days and I'm not sure if that's still extra hormones or if it's because of my diet.

This month has really been full of so many developments and changes.  Allie can scoot around in her crib now.  At one point in New Orleans, I noticed she was making really muffled grunting sounds and when I went to check on her, she had wedged herself into the corner of the pack n' play completely perpendicular to the way I had laid her.  She also rolled from her stomach to her back twice now.  She has officially discovered her voice.  She makes a lot more noises now and knows how to change the pitch of her babbles.  She seems to be crying a good deal louder these days.  Speaking of crying, she officially makes tears and it breaks my heart.  The second she starts crying, the tears start streaming.

I'll leave you with the pictures below. Carson around 4 months old, Allison today, and me a couple of months old.  I would guess how old I was based off of the cold weather clothing but I'm sure we lived in Maryland or Wisconsin so it was probably one constant winter season.  You can see Allie is pretty much 100% Noble though.

New Orleans//Traveling with an Infant

Carson and I just recently returned home after nearly a week in New Orleans.  I was pretty nervous about both Allie's first flight and walking around the Big Easy by myself.  Carson was attending an oil and gas conference most of the week, so my main goal for the trip was to entertain myself while making sure that Allie slept well at night (so Carson could function properly the following day).

The flight from Los Angeles to New Orleans actually went fairly well.  We were able to check our stroller and carseat (for free!) before having to go to through security.  I wore Allie in the BabyBjorn, and we simply walked right through the metal detector (they just checked my hands for explosives).  We brought our car seat, but ended up only using it twice on the trip--to and from the airport--we made do just fine without the base.  I tried to time it right to feed Allie during take off and landing but it didn't really work out that way. We just had to wing it and feed her as she became fussy. Her ears did not seem to bother her at all during flight. After 20 min. or so, she was able to find a comfy spot and slept for a good portion of the flight (so did I).

We stayed in the Warehouse District in the Hilton Garden Inn which was actually a really perfect location.  It was basically across the street from the convention center (perfect for Carson) and about a mile to the French Quarter and 2 miles to all the shops on Magazine Street.  Allie did okay sleeping in the hotel-provided pack n play.  We tried to not let her cry too much but I think the hotel strategically placed us so we wouldn't be a nuisance to other guests.  I took full advantage that there was nothing that needed to be cleaned, vacuumed, folded or scrubbed on our hotel room, so while she slept, I read.

On our first full day Carson and I simply walked around the French Quarter.  We had recently visited New Orleans in 2011 so everything was pretty familiar and there wasn't anything that we felt we HAD to see.  It was nice to just stroll around and enjoy the ambiance.

On Monday, I walked the two miles to Magazine Street.  I had read that there was good shopping over there and decided to be adventurous.  The sidewalks were, at times, pretty terrible but our stroller did great  (To think, I almost didn't bring it!).  I loved seeing all of the historic homes and it felt nice to be out of hubbub of the French Quarter.  Everyone was SO nice.  As I was walking, everyone said hello and many people commented on how cute Allie looked.  People just aren't like that in California.  Monday night, Carson's Grandfather got to meet Allie and offered to watch her for us while we went to an A&M event.  We went, realized we didn't know anyone, and left after swiping some appetizers and beer.

Tuesday, I got to meet up with my mom who drove in from Texas to spend some time with Allie.  We ate beignets at Cafe du Monde and then roamed.  It was nice to just walk around and catch up.  Carson got to have some fun on Bourbon street later that night.

Wednesday, I had breakfast with my mom and I got to see rain!  It was so wonderful being in the rain, Carson and I hadn't seen rain since last March.  The rain drops were huge and the smell made me think of home.  Later that afternoon Allie and I went back out and remembered how rain can leave behind a disgusting amount of humidity.   We just hung out in a coffee shop and then sat in the quarter and listening to a jazz band play.

We didn't leave until after 7 pm on Thursday.  We grabbed lunch at Warehouse Grille (my favorite place we ate!  Get the Morning After Burger!)  then decided that we needed something to do indoors so we wouldn't be gross on the flight home.  We ended up visiting the National WWII Museum.  We both really enjoyed it and highly recommend it if you're in New Orleans!  It was kind of expensive ($22 each!) but it's HUGE and we easily killed over 4 hours.

Our return flight didn't go quite as well.  First of all, the New Orleans airport didn't let us check the stroller until we got to the gate so we had to deal with that headache through security.  Surprisingly, at security, they did let me get through with my huge tube of ointment.  "Oh, this is for the baby?  Okay, it's not a problem."  I fed Allie once we were on the place.  This time, instead of passing out like she did on the first flight, she just couldn't get comfortable.  She would just cry and cry; I couldn't get her in a good position to fall asleep.  Carson and I both walked her up and down the aisles, but as soon as we sat down she wailed.  Eventually, I sat her up in my lap sideways and rubbed her belly and she literally fell asleep sitting up.  After that, I was able to move her to my shoulder and she slept the rest of the way.  Again, everyone around us was incredibly understanding.  Allie was one of four babies on that flight.

This trip made me incredibly homesick.  I miss rain.  I miss nice people.  I miss ferns.  I miss Texas.  I miss our family.  I miss 290.  I miss my friends.  However, we have decided that we won't be flying home for Thanksgiving or Christmas this year.  The flights weren't terrible, but it's not something we want to do again any time soon.  The trip has also really messed up Allie's sleep schedule and after a week of being home, she's still not back on track.  It's just not worth it to us to get her so out of whack.

Things I'd do differently:

On these two flights, I sat in the window seat for ease of nursing.  However, it made getting up to change the baby/going to the restroom/walking the baby a challenge.  I think next time we'll sit in the aisle.

I forgot how terrible humidity is.  I'm used to vacationing in California and being able to wear jeans/jean shorts multiple times.  Not the case when it's humid outside.  I ended up having to do laundry halfway through the trip.

Allison has reached a new level of spit up.  Not to mention, after using the burp cloth during the day, the humidity got to it and made it just feel wet everywhere.  I should have brought enough to have one for each day.

I knew I would be walking around the majority of time and didn't want another "nine toes" incident so I only brought chuck taylors and a very casual pair of flip flops.  I should have known to bring one nice outfit, but I didn't.  It ended up that I should have because we went to an A&M reception for the conference one night.

Next time, I'll research places to eat.  I know New Orleans is supposed to be a great spot for food and maybe I'm just cheap, but I don't like spending over $15 for a meal.  I wish we would have eaten at more places outside of the French Quarter.

Don't forget you need cash at Cafe Du Monde!

Thoughts on Motherhood

via

I've never been a worrier.  I feel like I've been pretty laid back and kind of just let things happen--at least the for last couple of years.  Motherhood has been a whole different ballgame.  I feel a constant mix of love/happiness/worry/excitement/sadness/pride.  Does she need socks?  Is she too hot?  Look at that smile!  I only have how many days left with her?  Will she ever take a bottle?  She's so strong!  She's SO cute!  SQUISHY THIGHS!  You just ate!  Cold hands!  Please let go of my hair/glasses/book.  She amazes me every day and I absolutely love being her mother.

I was so concerned in the beginning about getting breastfeeding down.  That was my goal and I wasn't going to let anything stand  in my way.  Because of that, Allie did not take a bottle until after she was 4 weeks old.  We've attempted to give her one bottle a week since she was about 2 months old but I'm really worried it's been too little to late.  Now, I have 2 weeks before I have to return to work and I'm doing everything I can to try to get her to take a bottle.  Once breastfeeding was going good, I should have started giving Allie more bottles.  It's hard though considering how easy breastfeeding is now.  I hate having to pump, make a bottle, warm the bottle, clean the bottle, etc, etc, etc.  I love breastfeeding but now I'm kicking myself.

Speaking of breastfeeding, I heard so much how it makes the pounds just fall off of you.  Totally not the case with me but I'm okay with that.  I still have 15 pounds to lose but I'm fine with keeping those if it means that I'll be successful breastfeeding (there's that thing again).  I'd hate to try really hard to lose those pounds and then have my supply tank.  So for now, I'll continue going on walks and running every now and then but I'm not going to push it.  Besides, there's a certain baby I'd rather be spending my time with and she can't go running with me yet.

I can tell you the exact moment that I felt a connection with Allie and it wasn't when she was born.  That was something that was really important to me and had a big role in my decision to breastfeed and have a natural delivery.  I was under the impression that without the impairment of drugs or an epidural, that I would instantly be bonded to my baby.  Not the case.  It happened at her 8 week Well Check.  I was surprised that it took that long, to be honest.  During weeks 1-7, I felt very protective but not bonded.  When she locked eyes with me across the room in the doctor's office that day, I melted.  I love that chunky little baby so much and I'm so excited to be her mom for the rest of my life and watch her grow.

I struggle with my priorities.  One night, Carson asked me if I felt like a mom first and a wife second.  The answer was yes, absolutely yes.  The night before, I had just been talking to my bible study group about how I'm struggling to realign my priorities.  I'm so totally wrapped up in everything Allie that I've been totally fine pushing my marriage and my relationship with God to the side.  I think it will be something I struggle with everyday.  I can totally see how parents get so wrapped up in their children's lives that they forget who they are and who their spouse is.  If I'm not with her, I'm thinking about her.  If I'm not holding her, I'm thinking about her.  If I AM with her, I'm thinking about her.  When she's sleeping, I'm thinking about her.  At this point, I absolutely can not fathom having another child.

I thought that I would want Allie wearing a headband constantly but it truly hurts my heart when I take it off and it has left a mark on her little head.  She even has a tiny head!  She was only in the 17th percentile at her 2 month doctor visit for head size.  She may look like a little boy at times, but I can't handle the feeling that I'm squishing her head just for the sake of cuteness.  Beauty should not be pain until you can choose to do it to yourself.

My views on abortion and child abuse are different and very passionate now.  After carrying my child for 40+ weeks and experiencing life with her in the flesh for the past 13 weeks, the thought of people murdering their children or having a child and possibly not wanting it or not doing the responsible thing if they know they can't care for it--it makes me want to throw up.  Bakersfield has something called the Garden of Innocence and recently buried three babies that were unwanted and died.  I can't even read/watch the stories without tearing up.  Here's the recent article on the Garden of Innocence.

I have mixed emotions about my return to work.  Carson and I have talked quite a bit about whether I should return or not.  Ultimately, I feel like no matter what I decide, there will be a part of me that wishes I could have the other.  One on hand, I like that working will allow for me to maintain my identity (something I struggle with when spending 24/7 with Allie) and will give me a chance to get up in the mornings and have something to look nice for.  Something to get me out of the house and some adult interaction.  On the other hand, I'm devastated that I won't be able to be at home with Allie.  I'll miss our moments together and I hate that by the time I get home, it will basically be time to start her bedtime routine and put her down.  I don't know how things will be when I go back to work.  I imagine things will be difficult.  But we've already experienced a little of what it would be like these past couple of months and it's not exactly easy either.

I had so many things I thought I would do in regards to sleeping.  I've coslept a couple of times but I slept so terribly that I didn't think it was worth it.  I was so aware of the fact that she was there that I couldn't fall into a very deep sleep.  It's adorable being right next to her while she's sleeping but not something I could do every night.  To ensure that Carson could get sleep, I slept on the couch and in the guest room with Allie in the bassinet or rocker for 6 weeks and then we moved her into her room and crib.  I thought I might have issues with letting Allie 'cry it out' but I have zero.  She's a good sleeper and if it takes 2 minutes of crying for her to get there, so be it.  She's been sleeping in her crib almost exclusively since she was about 7 weeks old.

I learn something new every day.  I never thought much about what it would be like to be a mother but it is far better than anything I ever dreamed of.

Citrus Lane September Box Review

Citrus Lane is a monthly subscription service that sends products for babies based on their age.  It is normally $25/month (plus tax).  I found a coupon code for 50% off a Citrus Lane box and decided to try it.  We received our first box in September.  Just like Birchbox, you receive a notification when your box ships and you can track it.  Citrus Lane ships from somewhere on the West Coast, so I get it much quicker than I get my Birchbox.  They also ship later in the month--around the 20th or so.

I received the following items:

Skip Hop Hug & Hide Lamb Chime Ball ($16.99 Amazon)  Allie seems to like the chime ball and I'm glad it's a lamb.  Lambs are special to the Noble family.  

Charley Harper 123s Board Book ($9.95 Amazon)  I like that it came with a book, but I wish it came with a different book.  I think the illustrations are unclear and confusing.

Dr. Smith's Diaper Ointment ($3.74 Amazon)  The ointment went straight in my diaper bag.  I like that it's more of a paste than a gel.  

Babytime Playful Wash ($2.40 Amazon)  The soap is a vegan, gluten free, natural product.  It's a bit runny but it does suds up well.  We'll use it, but we wouldn't buy it regularly.  

Julep Nail Polish in Coco ($14 Amazon)  The nail polish was a nice touch but I don't think it should be in this type of box.  Maybe I just didn't like it since I already subscribe to Birchbox,  but I bought a KID box for products to use for my child.  I do really like the nail polish though.  It's a really pretty maroon color and it is the full size of the product.

Total Box Value: $47.08

I'm still not sure how I feel about the box.  The products I received are definitely worth well more than the monthly cost but I worry about stocking up on useless baby junk.  I'm trying to keep the accumulation of toys and stuff to a minimum.  I think I'll get at least another box or two before I decide whether I want to cancel.